I have just been informed that my cell phone, which doesn't take photos, access the internet or grill bacon whilst letting the excess grease run off) is an "old model!"
(scoff scoff)...
How is that possible? Cell phones have only been around for, like, 2 years! Remember Zack Morris? HE had an old model-- a cell phone the size of a shoe box (but it still didn't get him his father's attention)!
Technology! I remember in third grade when we had to start TYPING UP papers on a COMPUTER! Weird! Nothing else from third grade is useful anymore: cursive handwriting, multiplication, and "Sarah Plain and Tall" (An Amish Giant? Hey Sarah, either join the WNBA or slap on some rouge).
Third Grade Reading List:
What about the book "Babar Tramples Madeline!"
or
"Encyclopedia Brown has a three-way with the Hardy Boys then makes a Superfudge on Nancy Drew's chest... while the Boxcar Children watch."
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